Friday, November 9, 2012

my reality

What is my reality?
Is it this blog where I post a picture of a food item once every couple of weeks?
Is it the crafting I do and post on here?
Is it the plants that are growing in the backyard because it is finally cool enough to play with dirt?
Is it the fact that I really can do my laundry in an evening and be done for the week?
Is it that sometimes my weekends are so quiet you can hear a pin drop?

Last week I had a discussion with someone about online personalities. How they aren't necessarily reality and may be seen by others as something that is in fact reality.

Does the reader of the blog think that the author's life only includes the things you see here? If your life doesn't include these things, does it make your life difficult because you'd like to be doing them? Kind of like dreaming through Pinterest?

In one way I might agree. I wasn't blogging, or even taking digital photos for that matter, when my house was filled with puking, dirty diaper dragging toddlers. I didn't have anywhere to share the lives of my littles when they were wreaking havoc. I do know a few things. I probably pulled my hair out when they colored on the walls, plugged the toilets with Duplo Legos, dumped flour all over the floor, flooded the patio and threw dirt blobs at the windows after being up all night with an ear infection. Neither was I blogging when I made cut out cookies with them and they had frosting plastered all over their faces or when the kids got the left over photos and scrapbooked right along with me.

That was my reality. It is no longer my reality.

In this current world of mine, the kids have grown. They're moving out faster than I can handle. Two of them have taken flight in the past two weeks. My job is to raise them to spread wings and fly. My heart doesn't like that little piece of the growing process.

There are some things I can write about them and feel free to share with you. The rest of it ... they are entitled to their privacy. If they want to share their up and downs through life, they can. I can't and won't.

Do I spend time baking in the kitchen without any interruptions somedays? Yup, I do. I can actually listen to an audio book while I play and not be interrupted by "mooooommmmm ... come wiiiiippppeee me" coming from the bathroom. If today that is your reality, it won't be for long. All right. You might consider 20 years a long time ...  I don't.

Can I play with crafty things and not worry about little fingers dragging the glue gun off the counter or all of a sudden sending a sewing machine into a mach speed run through space? I can. That is also my reality. Sometimes it may be weeks in between the playing sessions because I also have a life that is busy. I go to work. I'm about to start an online bachelor's program. I have responsibilities at church. I should grocery shop and cook once in a while.  I don't run and visit during my day off, but we do plenty of it on the weekends because it is important to us. I have plenty of things to fill the minutes of my days and evenings.

I almost feel like I need to explain something here. I don't sit and read a book except for about once a year. I listen to them for a very good reason. A long time ago I married a man who only had one speed in life. Lickety split fast. If he wasn't moving, he was sleeping. I don't think I was that kind of a person when I met him. Not even even when I married him, but that was only 3 months later. Who had time to learn new habits in that amount of time? Today, nearly 27 years later, I don't sit well. It may be in part due to the fact that I work out of the house. That means that in order to accomplish what I want to, I cram it in quickly or I won't get it done. It may be a combination of birth order and type A personality. I can't sit to read a book and be crafty at the same time. So I multi task and have found ways to do that. I know how to run the washing machine, the dishwasher, the bread machine, the audio book and the sewing machine .... all at one time. Why? Because I choose to. Because I want to. Because some of it is born of necessity and some of it breeds peace and tranquility in my days. Because there are days when I seriously need a good dose of peace and tranquility. My house walls may be free of crayon color, but somedays the walls of my heart are muddied from trampling.

In truth ... this is my reality. Tomorrow it may be a different one. Somedays it has been difficult to accept the changes that life brings. Whatever your reality is, grab on to it and run with it. Find a reason to laugh in it. Take moments to share it with family and friends. Share the joys of creativity with your children when they allow it.

If you're lucky enough to be able to relax a bit .... read a book for me!


  1. I seriously love reading your thoughts, Anita! And I love it that you remember all the joys, yet all the busyness of the years of having little ones in the house. You're realistic and poetic! And I hope you're having a great day today!

  2. I'd like to ditto what Joni said. I have had the same thoughts that you started this blog with. I wonder why I blog sometimes but I've always been a writer and this is a baby step to doing something publishing-like about it. Is it the same for you?

  3. I really don't know why I blog, but I seem to enjoy it. I know that I have parents who faithfully read me every morning and give me a reminder when I've been negligent. They keep me on my toes. I've never thought of publishing anything, but will someday print it so I can read (with even stronger prescriptions) while I rock in my white rocker on the porch. Maybe part of it is so I don't forget where I've been and where I hoped to go.

  4. Isn't interesting how we adapt our spouse's behaviors? I used to do everything in one speed too- likidy slit. Now being married to lars I have become such a home body and don't need to run as much as I used too! or maybe I am just getting older! :) I have not read your blog in a while, it has been fun to check up on what you were doing, you have a gift of writing!