Monday, May 18, 2015

24 sleeps

Before the 24 sleeps, I must tell you that I'm really excited about the other number ratting around in my head.

8 days of school left.
8 days of making sure someone made it to school on time because she doesn't like mornings anymore than I did at that age.
8 days until I have no more homework to worry about.
8 days until my baby graduates high school.

Throw the hat! Have a party!!

We are relatively young to be at this stage of life.
We certainly have many friends who will be working on projects and papers long after we're done.

I'm ready to be done with all that.

I'm not so ready to be done with the other part.

The 24 sleeps part.

We are 24 sleeps away from being empty nesters.
Like, all the birds will have flown.

I often think of the eagle and the way their nest is prepared for their young.

"Though many of us have seen pictures of a huge eagle's nest high in the branches of a tree or in the crag of a cliff, few of us have gotten a glimpse inside. When a mother eagle builds her nest she starts with thorns, broken branches, sharp rocks, and a number of other items that seem entirely unsuitable for the project. But then she lines the nest with a thick padding of wool, feathers, and fur from animals she has killed, making it soft and comfortable for the eggs.

"By the time the growing birds reach flying age, the comfort of the nest and the luxury of free meals makes them quite reluctant to leave. That's when the mother eagle begins stirring up the nest. With her strong talons she begins pulling up the thick carpet of fur and feathers, bringing the sharp rocks and branches to the surface. As more of the bedding gets plucked up, the nest becomes more uncomfortable for the young eagles. Eventually, this and other urgings prompt the growing eagles to leave their once-comfortable abode and move on to more mature behavior."

We all know that our job is raise our children so they can leave the nest.
But for the mother, whose purpose for years has been the rearing of her children and keeping them safe and protected, it isn't the easy thing to do.
At least for this mother.
And when it comes to the youngest ... I've done more protecting than pushing.
By far.
It's a good thing she has older brothers.
I'm going to buy stock in Kleenex.
Put boxes in every room.
I'll wander around waiting for her to come home and share the latest teen girl drama and heartache with me.
I'll worry about her getting home safely and then realize that she isn't coming home.
I might text her to say "where r u?" just because.
I'll buy her favorite foods and then realize she isn't here to eat them.
I am even going to miss her cranky days.
I'll clean her room out and make it a guest room.
And wait for her to be the guest.
24 sleeps.

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